Wedding Politics
Wednesday, October 17, 2007 at 2:00 pm
- 10 Comments
If you’ve been married and didn’t elope, you know what I’m talking about. If you’ve never been married and haven’t been intimately involved in a wedding, you have absolutely no idea how to begin your comprehension of what I’m about to discuss.
Politics is nothing compared to organizing a wedding. It’s impossible to get everything you want at a reasonable price, but it’s your special day, and don’t you want the best? Well, it is the only one, and yes, it is just money.
Who am I kidding? Organizing a wedding is politics.It begins with planning details between the betrothed. And their parents. And their friends. And then the guest list. The. Guest. List. Do we invite that relative? What about this one? Well, we can’t invite her without also inviting him, but if we invite them then we have to invite that aunt on this side or else everyone will have a conniption over the salad course.
Oh, there are actual politics too — there’s the fire-breathing, gun-toting Republican uncle on one side and the dyed-in-the-wool-liberal-who-can-cuss-in-several-languages-including-some-that-aren’t-spoken-anymore grandfather on the other side, and heaven forbid they be allowed to meet, let alone have a conversation. About anything. Have to factor that into the seating arrangement.
Oh God, the seating arrangement. Can we trust people to sort themselves in politically and socially acceptable ways? Will this day actually happen without also causing the end of the world as we know it?
You know, I actually think it will.
You see, I’m getting married on Sunday. As a result, I’m in the middle of a little down time politically and, well, bloggerly. I’m actually writing this late Tuesday night, and I’m looking forward to five straight days of errands, cleaning, last-minute arrangements, airport trips, visiting with family and friends, rehearsals, invoice payments, and a wedding in which I am to play a leading role.
And what is that shiny prize waiting at the end of the tunnel?
Ah, that’s the good part: not just a wedding, but a marriage. That’s a pretty powerful thing.
In at least one real, not-so-snarky sense, I think getting married is a lot like the political process. Both are exercises in recognition and focus on the greater good. Both require working with and listening to an insane number of expert opinions before chucking them all and making decisions based on what you already knew. Both, if executed correctly, lead to greater happiness and harmony in the world, whether that world is Earth or simply the home and family one is building.
At least that’s the way it should be. I think a lot of people get caught up in the minutiae — what does this quarterly fund-raising total mean, what do we do with this chunk of 20 minutes between ceremony and reception, who’s endorsing who, how many hors d’oeuvres are we ordering again? If we keep our eyes on the prize, on that truly greater good, then our cause will be a good one, and the results will always be good, too.
Now, if you’ll excuse me. Errands call.
10 Comments
Comment posted October 17, 2007 @ 3:38 pm
Congratulations! Joe:
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! This was a great post to read.
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 7:57 am
Congratulations Joe! Congrats!
Two pieces of advice.
1. Get some time the morning of the wedding with either your wife to be or your groomsmen, and do something relaxing.
Trust me.
2. Do not feature goldfish as a part of your center pieces, as they will all die.
Okay, the second one only applied to me I bet. But none the less congratulations!
Sean
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 10:01 am
What an Institution Let’s just imagine for a moment that we wanted all marriages to fail. Let’s pretend that we’ve concluded that divorce is the best possible outcome for every marriage.
How would we accomplish something like that?
Well, we would make all marriages start with something like the modern wedding ceremony. No couple could get married without having one of these events that now cost an average of $30,000. That means that the young couple is highly likely to start their marriage with considerable debt. Let’s put the maximum amount of pressure on the wedding couple by dragging the event out over many hours. Even better, let’s tell them that this is supposed to be the happiest day of their lives. That jacks up the pressure! Now let’s add all the politics mentioned above about who does and does not get invited. Throw in more politics about the choices of venue, gown, music and so forth. With an event THIS complicated, there are sure to be issues to divide the families and probably the wedding couple. And since we want to be sure this huge event will make people unhappy, we will be sure to see to it that unlimited alcohol is available to folks who have been partying for hours.
We can’t be SURE this will result divorce in each case, but the modern wedding does about all it can do to make sure the wedding couple gets off to the worst possible start! What an institution.
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 11:53 am
reminding myself how happy I am that I eloped
although that still cost about 2000….
Comment posted October 17, 2007 @ 10:38 am
Congratulations! Joe:
Congratulations on your upcoming wedding! This was a great post to read.
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 2:57 am
Congratulations Joe! Congrats!
Two pieces of advice.
1. Get some time the morning of the wedding with either your wife to be or your groomsmen, and do something relaxing.
Trust me.
2. Do not feature goldfish as a part of your center pieces, as they will all die.
Okay, the second one only applied to me I bet. But none the less congratulations!
Sean
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 5:01 am
What an Institution Let's just imagine for a moment that we wanted all marriages to fail. Let's pretend that we've concluded that divorce is the best possible outcome for every marriage.
How would we accomplish something like that?
Well, we would make all marriages start with something like the modern wedding ceremony. No couple could get married without having one of these events that now cost an average of $30,000. That means that the young couple is highly likely to start their marriage with considerable debt. Let's put the maximum amount of pressure on the wedding couple by dragging the event out over many hours. Even better, let's tell them that this is supposed to be the happiest day of their lives. That jacks up the pressure! Now let's add all the politics mentioned above about who does and does not get invited. Throw in more politics about the choices of venue, gown, music and so forth. With an event THIS complicated, there are sure to be issues to divide the families and probably the wedding couple. And since we want to be sure this huge event will make people unhappy, we will be sure to see to it that unlimited alcohol is available to folks who have been partying for hours.
We can't be SURE this will result divorce in each case, but the modern wedding does about all it can do to make sure the wedding couple gets off to the worst possible start! What an institution.
Comment posted October 18, 2007 @ 6:53 am
reminding myself how happy I am that I eloped
although that still cost about 2000….
RSS feed for comments on this post.
Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.
