Trailing the McCain campaign: bread and circuses … and doughnuts

Mmmm….Doughnuts. Or at least that’s what the McCain campaign would like us to believe: Forget the sagging economy, forget the increasing war casualties, forget the fact that McCain doesn’t know the difference between Shiites and Sunnis. Real Americans find solace in doughnuts. After all, “America runs on Dunkin.’” Must. Have. Sprinkles.

In the last few weeks, McCain’s Dunkin’ Donuts “habit” has been on par with Ronald Reagan’s Jelly Bellies obsession. The New Yorker noted recently that Straight Talk Express was loaded with Dunkin’ Donuts and Coke — “staples of the McCain diet.” Then there was that embarrassing moment when an Associated Press moderator brought McCain a box of Dunkin’ Donuts (with sprinkles!) and more than 3,800 news outlets reported the story as if were some funny, warm-hearted gesture. Must. Have. Doughnut holes. With Sprinkles.

Of course this is all a well-plotted campaign, both in McCain’s attempt to reach out to “Dunkin’ Donut Dems” (Must. Have. Fake. Latte.) and stump for a major supporter of his campaign, a company that has its hands in all sorts of businesses, including mortgages, aerospace and defense. It’s like that time Lollapalooza totally sold out and was sponsored by Verizon. Only this time it’s a presidential campaign. And the company is a joint venture with the Carlyle Group and Bain Capital. 

To be sure, this isn’t the first time Dunkin’ Donuts has made an appearance on the campaign trail. At Bush’s inaugural dinner three years ago, the menu was created to honor the companies that funded the campaign. The main course? A Coca-Cola brined Pilgrim’s turkey with Dunkin’ Donuts old-fashioned cake-doughnut stuffing.

But the case of the dunked doughnut doesn’t just end with pimping a donor: In 2006 the doughnut chain was snatched up by Bain Capital Partners and the Carlyle Group for $2.425 billion. The Carlyle Group once employed Bush senior, and Bush junior served on its board of directors. Mitt Romney founded Bain Capital in 1984.

But Dunkin’ Donuts — they’re the workingman’s rest stop, right?