You don’t need Bob Dylan to tell which way the road goes

But you might get him anyway. Word has reached our shores that the Bard of Hibbing is being courted by car companies who want his voice telling their customers via satellite-navigation systems whether to turn right or left.  

This is only according to one source, however, and not a very reliable one at that. Here’s what Bob Dylan told his “Theme Time Radio Hour” audience Sunday night:

I am talking to a couple of car companies about being the voice of their GPS system. I think it would be good if you are looking for directions and hear my voice saying something like: left at the next street, no a right — you know what? Just go straight. I probably shouldn’t do it because which ever way I go I always end up at one place: Lonely Avenue.

And if you’re driving anywhere near Newport, R.I., he’ll tell you to go electric … or at least hybrid.

Dylan may seem an unlikely object of an automaker bidding war for a disembodied voice of geographic correctness. For one thing, his recent wanderings through the streets of Long Branch, N.J., were directionless enough that he got picked up by the cops. For another, his voice is his own unique corruption of a Northern Minnesota accent that according to one intrepid journalist’s interpretation now sounds like a “coy jokester.”

But by the reckoning of the United Kingdom’s Daily Telegraph, Dylan “could soon be directing drivers down Highway 61.” Or how about narrating a road trip to Kansas, with President Obama as a launching point:

He’s like a fictional character, but he’s real. First off, his mother was a Kansas girl. Never lived in Kansas though, but with deep roots. You know, like Kansas bloody Kansas. John Brown the insurrectionist. Jesse James and Quantrill. Bushwhackers, Guerillas. Wizard of Oz Kansas.

A safe bet would have Dylan working for Cadillac, if they’re still in business. He starred in a TV ad for Cadillac’s Escalade and XM satellite radio service in 2007:

[Via Greg Kjos]