101 reasons to take a Staycation this weekend

Who needs a cabin by the lake — or a family in the far corners of the state to get drunk with — when you can take a serious Staycation in the Twin Cities this weekend? There are thousands of reasons to take a Staycation. Heck, we can think of a ton of them. Of course, we need your help.

1. Gas prices are $4 a gallon in the Twin Cities: That means, on average, if you had a car that got 22 mpg highway miles, the cost of meeting up with your family somewhere on the North Shore and driving back would be somewhere around $70. Did you know you could buy a meal and drinks in the lounge of the famous La Belle Vie for that price?

2. Speaking of gas and knowing things, did you know that, on average, gas station owners only receive about two-cents per gallon of gas sold? And that the majority of the money goes directly to the refineries? On top of that, according to MPR, they have to pay around two percent of every credit card transaction to the credit card companies.

3. After slightly retreating for two years, Minnesota mosquitoes are back with a blood-thirsty vengeance. Given the rain-soaked grounds, who wants to camp in a mosquito’s bed? You might get, like, LaCrosse Encephalitis or something. Or even worse–"chopped up" legs.

4. Your friends totally don’t like you anymore after you had a baby and only talk about "my baby" and all of the super-expensive baby-entertaining contraptions and organic, fair-trade, germ-free, disinfected, non-China-made, handmade,  brain-stimulating, soul-invigorating, baby-stress-reducing, mind-calming gear you insist on toting with you to the cabin every time.

5. You like confusing the sound of fireworks with gun shots and vice versa at 3 a.m.

6. You can’t wait to Twitter more news about former attorney general Mike Hatch. For example: "Revenge or shenanigans in AG’s office!? Update! Update!"

7. You can’t wait to be the first to "re-tweet" above news.

8. You really want to see Eddie Money this weekend at Taste of Minnesota.

9. You ask your friend to house sit for you, but he tells you that your television makes him cry.

10. You don’t like the smell of urine in the morning.

Now add you own!