Polar bear puppets, zombies and Ron Paul supporters carrying a giant copy of the Constitution were among the marchers down Nicollet Mall in Minneapolis today as part of the nonpartisan Liberty Parade, a demonstration “for freedom of expression” that nonetheless received heckles as it passed RNC-packed hotels. “Assholes,” shouted one serious-faced onlooker while puppets of Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and Rice passed by in prison stripes with their hands shackled together.

The parade also featured a fake Barbara Bush motorcade (complete with Secret Service agents), a black-clad group dressed in V for Vendetta masks blasting Twisted Sister’s “We’re Not Gonna Take It” on a stereo, a lifelike polar bear puppet (aimed at VP candidate Sarah Palin’s lawsuit to remove the animal from the endangered species list), and a painted truck carrying the Missile Dick Chicks from Crawford, Texas, with one bewigged Chick riding a skyward-pointed missile painted with the words “Dr. Strange-McCain,” kicking her go-go boots as others sang “Bomb Iran” to the tune of the Beach Boys’ “Barbara Ann” and carried Cheney’s head in a bottle of formaldehyde.

“A woman straddling a large silver metal phallus, it’s hard to beat that,” remarked bystander Ian Rans. “I liked the people who were skipping,” he added. “They could have had a sign saying ‘It could be worse.’”

The recurring theme was defense of constitutional liberty. “This is a test of the emergency free speech system,” read a sign carried by Ben Masel of Madison, Wis. “If this had been an actual emergency, there would have been preemptive raids by the sheriff’s department,” he announced. Similar sentiments united a surprising array of participants, from Church of Scientology protesters Anonymous (wearing the Vendetta masks) to Ron Paul “freedom fighters.” (Who, for good measure, were answered by a Ron Paul sign with the word “SUCKS” painted across it.)

“It’s a very slippery slope with all this data-mining in this country,” said Texas Ron Paul backer Brian Bymark. “If you don’t do something now, you might not be able to do something later.”

Bymark said he won’t vote for either party’s candidate, citing Obama’s plans for escalation in Afghanistan. Masel, with the “free speech system” sign, said he’ll vote Obama, “but without falling in love.” Avram Leierwood, 16, in full zombie makeup, said he’ll support a Republican, but not McCain. “I’d vote for zombie Abraham Lincoln,” he said.